Overcoming Self-Medicating and Addiction

This is a testimony of how I overcame self-medicating and addiction. I would just like to say that since my very first RU meeting in 2010 – my life changed forever. 

I am not that same person I was all those years ago and all glory goes to God! 

I was born to a drug-addicted father, who physically abused my mother, and molested me from 3 to 10 years of age. This abuse caused horrible mental issues for me and by age 12 I was self-medicating with drugs and alcohol.  I had no sense of any value or self-worth. I suffered from horrible flashbacks and terrible shame for what I kept seeing in my mind.  I felt inferior to everyone around me – I was a misfit.  In my mind, I was ugly and horrible to look at—like my shame showed on the outside of my body.

My cycle of addiction was duplicated over and over again, and I believed it was way bigger than me, and I would never escape it. At one point, I decided I didn’t need anyone—that I couldn’t trust people—so I created what I called a “safe place” for myself. That meant smoking pot all day long with only the voices in my head. But it wasn’t “safe” because I was a prisoner to the lies that Satan fed me. So I was not only addicted to pot and cigarettes, but also to pain, anger, bitterness, fear, pity, and depression.

The first night I went to RU, I was a mess.  I was high and took 5 smoke breaks. I was not about to make any commitments because I had done that before and failed every time. But that very night, I allowed God to do for me, what I could not do for myself. Overcome my Self-Medicating and addiction to drugs, cigarettes, and alcohol.

Beloved, my life has changed forever! I learned that Truth makes free! The very next day I opened my Bible to John 8:31-32. When I read how Jesus was teaching those Jews who believed on Him…if you “continue in my Word,” and that is what struck me as the Answer … I thought,  “I must continue  (meaning: every single day) to know my Savior better!”

RU has taught me how to read the Bible and understand it — one verse at a time; one principle at a time; one fruit at a time…to know the Truth. Now, I truly love God and He has given me an incredible ability and opportunity to love those who don’t love themselves.

I am now fulfilling God’s purpose for my life, and I praise Him for that every day. 

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2 thoughts on “Overcoming Self-Medicating and Addiction

  1. I can relate to this in so many ways. I’m not able to reach out anymore for help and am not going to make it. I also suffer from severe depression and bipolar 1 disorder. All of this is to much every moment of every day. Even now I’m overwhelmed by the feeling that this note is pointless

  2. Yes RU is a great program, and I’m glad it has helped so many people, just don’t feel like I fit in to it was told by my group leader that it’s not a support group it’s away of life I need the support right now I’m not do the workbook fast enough for her so she thinks I’m not trying when I really am.

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